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 Well,
thanks for showing up (looking at my watch the time is 11:30 - only
a couple of hours late for our breakfast meeting), you guys want a coffee
or anything, or do you want to start? (the guys pull up chairs, and
Jano picks up a knife and starts cleaning his nails).
Dano:
I wouldn't mind a coffee (yelling to the waitress) COFFEE! COFFEE!
HEY OVER HERE YOO HOO! (the waitress comes over, looking really impressed
and pours coffee for the guys. I sit amazed, all of them except for
Vano poured out half their cups into their water glasses, and then
proceed to use up all the sugar and cream at the table - Vano mixes
in a spoon full of catsup and syrup).
Stano: So,
what (slurp) do you (slurp) want to know?
(I dig out my list of questions)
I'll cut right to it. Why another tribute album? And how did you guys
decide to record It's For You?
Dano:
(slurp) Well, it was (slurp) our manager's idea. He called up Stano
...
Stano:
Yeah, I got the call ...
Dano: Excuse
me, I was talking.
Stano: Whatever,
but I got the call.
Vano: It
was a phone call?
Dano: Shut
up you.
Vano: Sorry
(slurp).
Dano: I'll
answer the question (slurp). You guys shut up and drink your coffee.
(Lots of sour faces, and much slurping, which is going to make it
hard to transcribe Dano's answer later) Anyway, Stano gets this call,
and I can tell he has no idea what to say to whoever is on the phone
(dirty look from Stano) so he hands me the phone and says "It's
for you." I listen to the pitch and tell him we're in.
Which song?
Dano:
You not paying attention? "It's for You" - stupid (slurp).
So I hung up the phone ...
Vano: The
phone call, is that what we're talking about?
Dano: (glaring
at Vano) Shut - up. So I hang up th...
Vano: You
know, mom always hated it when you told me to shut up.
Stano: Yeah,
she thought it showed poor breeding and reflected badly on her as
a mother.
Jano: He
got in more trouble when he would tell me to fu...
Dano: OKAY!
Look, you want to answer the question (looking at his brothers) or
do you want me to continue? (silence, and slurping) Thank you, (slurp)
anyway funny thing, it turns out Stano had no idea what the heck I
was talking about when I hung up the phone and I told him we'd just
committed to singing "It's for You" for some 77s tribute
album.
Vano: Who
are the 77s?
Jano: Some
band who had an album in the 80's that was on Island records around
the same time as The Joshua Tree, except unlike U2's album nobody
bought the 77s album.
Vano: Wow,
how'd you know that?
Jano: The
webbernet.
Dano: You
done?
Jano: (slurp)
Yeah.
Hold on, you didn't know the
band, and you'd never heard the song? What are you guys doing submitting
a song to a tribute album if you're not fans?
Dano:
Hey, I never said we weren't fans. We just weren't their fans, that's
all - semantics. We just didn't know the song, but we learned it.
I downloaded the tabs, and thought it was pretty easy to play.
Stano: It's
in G right?
Dano: How
would you know? You can hardly sing let alone play the guitar.
Stano: I
can play the piano. There's a G key on the piano.
Vano: (stirring
in more catsup) Hmmm, there's a G on the bass too.
Dano: Okay,
it was in G. Which made it as easy to play as just about anything
written by Bob Dylan.
Jano: It's
for You is going on a Bob Dylan tribute album? Can I sing a song too,
I can sound like Bob. Check this out, "Mrrrmmrrmmbble Maggie's
farrmmmuble evermmmumble mmband of the handmmmmuble." (silence,
followed by a flurry of crumpled sugar packets bouncing off Jano's
head and shoulders)
(I look at my watch, it's
11:50. The waitress comes over and pours more coffee as well as refreshing
our supply of cream and sugar.) So you're happy with the song? How did
you approach the project?
Jano:
I gotta take a leak.
Stano: Me
too.
Vano: I
think the turtle is poking his head out of the shell.
(Disgusted) You guys want to
take five? (the guys leave before I get an answer leaving Dano and me
alone at the table).
Dano:
(slurp) Bunch of taters. In terms of being happy with the song. Yeah,
I think it's pretty good. I mean considering the source material we
had to work with, I think we freakin' rocked. The approach we took
in the studio was surprisingly simple. We plugged in, let the tape
roll and tracked the whole thing in about 15 minutes, including mixing.
I mean it was bloody brilliant. In fact I'd go so far as to say our
version is so good that if you played both songs back to back you'd
have a hard time telling the difference.
(At this point I've had about
enough) Look, I listened to a rough mix on the way over, and Dano -
I've got to ask, did you even listen to the original version that Mike
recorded?
Dano:
No. I thought it would be better if we
didn't unduly influence our performance with a lot of clutter.
(The others arrive back, making
a big production out of tucking in their shirts and adjusting their
pants. Vano appears to have toilet paper hanging out the back of his
trousers.)
Stano:
Miss anything?
No, Dano and I were just finishing.
Dano:
We're done?
Yeah, I'm finished.
Dano:
I thought you wanted to talk about Mick Rowe. I even went out and
bought an old Tempest CD just so I wouldn't look like an idiot.
Stano: (mumbling
sarcastically) No chance of that.
Dano: What
was that?
Stano: Nothing.
Jano: I
do sound like Bob don't I? I can do Tom Petty too, but I have to stick
peas up my nose to get the sound right.
Vano: You're
picking up the tab? (I nod "Yes") Waitress! Menus over here!
(I get up shaking my head.
I walk out debating with myself as to whether or not I should erase
the tape)
Jevon the Tall
banopernalia.com
June 2004
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